But Enough About Me by Jancee Dunn

Author:Jancee Dunn
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
ISBN: 9780061739811
Publisher: HarperCollins
Published: 2007-10-19T21:00:00+00:00

I showed up an hour early for the shoot. Lou hastened over. “I hate everyone today,” he announced by way of greeting. “I walked to this shoot filled with rage. The whole fuckin’ city is filled with twenty-five-year-old women talking talking talking on their cell phones, with their cigarettes and their lower back tattoos and their little fuckin’ dogs. You know what I was doing while I was walking here? I was deliberately bumping into people on the sidewalk who were on their cell phones.”

“Lou,” I broke in. “I’m feeling a littl—”

“—I was just hoping they would say something to me so I could lash out. And you know what, I used to love Starbucks—like, instead of having a bag of candy in the afternoon I would have a mocha Frappuccino, but now I hate it, because every time I go in, there are these throngs of twenty-five-year-old women all saying that they need their Starbucks, and they’re all in there slurping Starbucks like it’s a giant cock.” He sighed loudly. “I just want to go home and make a list of people I hate, but I’m afraid that when I die, people will discover it and say that I was crazy.”

His eyes flicked to my forehead and he abruptly stopped talking. “What is that?” he asked, frowning. “Did you hurt yourself?” He examined me from the side. “I hate to tell you this, but it actually shows up if you’re in profile,” he said in a low voice. “Listen, when you’re talking to Bono, it might be best if you faced the camera.”

“But doesn’t that look strange if he’s answering one of my questions and I’m staring at the camera?”

Lou gave me a meaningful look.

“I look like a unicorn, don’t I?” I said.

He shrugged. “It’s a little distracting.”

The band arrived with no entourage except for their publicist. Bono, at about five feet seven inches, was much shorter than I expected—you’ll notice that he usually wears shoes or boots with a platform on them—but his charisma was like a crackling force field. He introduced himself to and shook hands with every member of the crew before making his way over to me.

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